On Pets and Pests

Performance slide lecture /Diavortrag
2003

"(...) We had a barbecue in our back garden the other day. It’s a lovely garden.

The problem is the snails that eat everything that manages to grow there.

We’ve got lots of wood-lice, too. That’s the kind of bug that lives under stones. That rolls up into a ball if you frighten it.

One day i dug up the earth in there.
I had wanted to plant an onion that had grown old in our fruit basket and developed some green.

I dug with my bare hands. My flatmate was watching, and he was terrified. He was disgusted and really worried and said I’d better go and wash my hands.

But it’s much dirtier in your average London bus, with its greasy railings.

But he is not on good terms with animals anyway.

The other day he asked me if horses really do sweat. There was an advertising slogan that said ‘Women glow. Men transpire. Horses sweat.’
I told him they sweat big time. You see them glistening."

(...)

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